grad night on the 26th of may.
i shall let photos do MOST of the talking.. lol..







pathetic. my parents dunno how to zoom in!!





wad am i doing?





our signature pose - FLASHERS!!!






where r our certs??





the ah gua in action again..




act gangsters..



with my fave acc tcher - mr cheng.
he was the one who gave my all the sympathy marks to lemme pass.
n nv once find me irritating even though i can nv seem to understand accounting.








pop the scroll!!





gals on the right.. guys on the left. the unclassifiable in the middle.. lol..



we didnt wan to let them take a photo in peace. lol



haiyo.. naidi y u keep resisting me??



sumbody pls tell me wad r they trying to prove..


we got a paparazzi-style photo of these lovebirds. lol..






how can i not take a photo with my joker face??




i tink i have enough proofs to say tt they r together..
hoh.... i must tell desmond!!




so aft all the photo-taking. we took xt's sis car to cityhall to return the attires.
sat down at burger king for some in-between snacks while waiting for the others.
wh ate 2 burgers loh!!




then we took the train to somerset..
ate at balcony.. again!!









drug addict..





im gng to miss these faces lots!!






handsome not??



















had an unforgettable night..

got rejected by SIM too.
my father said some hurtful words to me tt night.
i dunno how to describe it.
but.. well. i noe he loves me.. n care for me.
but i dun agree with the way he expresses it.
it;s been too many times.
hurting me with those harsh words of urs.
then pretending tt it nv happened the next day.
yes.. of cuz u can do it.
but how can i?
how do a broken heart mend so fast?
everytime my heart has almost reach full recovery, u shoot me again with those arrows.
it's gng to take quite long for me to heal this time

yo ho pple. it's me!!
obviously....

it's grad day tml.
having abit of mixed emotions nw.
i dunno to be happy or sad.
glad tt we r all moving to a new chapter in our lives.
sad tt we may not be included in some's..

n n n..
i've nv lyk the feeling noeing tt a place where u've been gng for the past few yrs.
suddenly become somewhere u dun belong in.
it's lyk i go to sch knowing tt im part of the sch..
but nw i go in, i dun feel lyk part of the sch anymore.
i nv lyk this feeling..
i wan to go everywhere knowing tt i am still regarded as part of tt place n the crowd..

tml's entertainment will be watching wh shave his hair!!
wah.. damn cool lah!!

will be back with lots of photos..
i hope i wun look lyk toot shit in them!

hello ppple..

gng back to work at igenius in june..
yay!!! im seeing the kids again!!

wow.. it's been one yr.
last yr i worked there during june too.
this yr im working there during june again!!

anyway, my colleague just introduced me a variety show called "we got married" in korean.
super funny
must go watch!!
best is the couple of Hwang Bo and Kim Hyun Joong!
they r really cute n funny n touching!!

bye!

edited:
i just finished watching wgm.
omg super sad!

hello pple!

smu rejected me.
how can how can?
didnt they see my last sem results?
quite gd wad? ahh.. it's their loss.

hah. cant be.
i noe my results the best.
applying to smu was only a try-my-luck kind of thing.
wad i didnt expect was they wld also send notification letter to the failed applicants too.
so when my father told me they got the letter n said i was rejected, i kind of dun blif them.
really wad.. those contest also lyk tt.
we regret tt only shortlisted candidates will be notified.

recently, i tink i've been played.
getting all worked up when a guy express a slight interest in me.
waiting for his msg when he say he will.
where's de msg?

thru this incident, it really woke me up.
im always lyk tt.
easily influenced.
i might have no feelings for a guy.
but when he say things tt i sense some interest,
i started tinkg tt hmm.. maybe i did have tt slight feelings for him..
then leave me hanging there.. high n low.

actually im not angry at anybody or wad.
i just wan to remind myself tt i really got to protect myself.
cuz everytime this happens, the one who ends up getting hurt is me.
i must noe how to control my own feelings.

hello!!

since im not hurried in doing my work..
lemme do a quick update here.

went to cut hair with georgina n my sis.
kenji quit.
got served by another guy..
so called "the senior hairstylist"
but i nv see him there b4..
ok.. i tink im getting used to it.
but the result wasnt as satisfying as wad kenji had provided.
hahah. nw i have bangs again!!!!
but i dun tink we will return there again.
n they simply refuse to tell us where kenji had gone to.
actually is a whole big grp of them.
all just suddenly disappear.

then had a gathering with the gang.
only us 4 gals, wh, danial n derrick attended.
shopped abit, eat abit, drink abit at balcony.
ooh, i find out they got really gd lunch n dinner menu at balcony.
can try eating there next time.
food good anot, i dunno.
havent try yet.

saw the yrbk tt my sis bought.
my name is on the yr bk
as in not in the class photo pages lah.
but under food implosion even cuz we won.
n there's photo of me in food implosion n talentime too
luckily not very ugly taken.

changed peanut's name to cheekopeh.
sounds so much happier. ahahah

sharing grad attire with georgina.
cut down cost.. recession mah.. lol.

oh. pple. pls go n see georgina's blog.
i m so tempted by her to fly to thai nw.
n ytd i saw a travel prog on bali!!!
wah kao.
my life-long ambitions: all abt gng to certain countries.
ahhaha

me n my auntie kept talking abt hw we miss japan.
of cuz we will go back again.
but for nw, im still hoping for the yr-end snow ski-ing trip in ko-ri-a!!!

my sis dl nds prog to learn jap.
nw i can say 1-19 in jap.
not bad. in just one night..
no.. actually is less than one hr!!
my language quite gd huh!!

bran's got to go for blood-taking this sat.
there's lumps growing on the side of his neck.
i had it once too.
but nobody was so worried over me.
YYYYYY!!!!!
"im nobody's child.. im nobody's child..
just lyk a flower, im growing up wild..
no mommy's kisses n no daddy's smile..
nobody wans me, im nobody's child.."

ok. bye!!
or rather a new word i learnt..
frm PARIS HILTON!!!

TTYM!!!!

i need sumwhere to pour my feelings.
i cant contain them anymore.
it's suffocating me.
since i've nv heard tt he has read my blog..
i shall say it here..

funny a major thing happened this wk..
n it's kind of disturbing lah..
so much so tt i cldnt slp last night.
i was tinkg abt alot of things.
n i even had to climb out of bed to jot it down.
in case i miss out any pts tt i wan to say.

i just read back on my entries abt tt fateful day..
i noe i wished him gd luck.
i wished tt everybody will haf their happy lives aft tt.
but hah.. i tink this is god's way to let me grow up.
nw we r working at the same place, diff dept nonetheless.
but we will almost see each other at the end of the day.

i dun haf much experience in facing a soured friendship.
so when i saw him, i didnt noe wad to do.
i didnt even noe if i shld approach him.
so my first instinct told me to run.
so i avoided him. n avoided this whole thing.
i didnt even let him noe tt i saw him.
aft everything had calmed down, i heard alot of explanation abt y he went the othe way
things lyk he went to certain place cuz he wans to meet certain pple.
yeah.. tt may be a reason..
but it didnt ans to my qn..
y lie?
does he really see us as pple tt he cannot be honest to?
but aft sum thorough tot, i realised tt we r pple who will still force him to go with us even aft he had say his reason.
this might be the reason y he sees the need to hide it frm us.

of cuz deep down in my heart, i wish tt we cld be just lyk b4..
i like him, i min as a fren.
his company, his humour, his randomness, n the 3 yrs of frenship tt we have.
i rmbed once when both of us were talking on the train home.
he told me tt if i ever get a job, i haf to tell him.
then he will go n get a job too.
i asked him y.
he told me tt if i have a job, i wun be gng out with them frequently.
n at tt time, pple were all bz with their gfs or bfs, or some dun even go out
so i tink he didnt wan to be the only one left.
i also rmbed tt i always go out with wad i called my "3-Ds"
nw tt one frenship's ruined, the other's bz with wad he says is rugby coaching.
n the last D. i can only say tt we r always eating non-halal meal, so it's seldom he will come out with us.

i hate the feeling when things r left unclear, but at the same time, im also not the type to take the initiative to clarify things.
i guess the feeling of the latter option is stronger, so in the end, i chose to run away frm this.

i dunno is it just me or wad, but i feel a tension n awkwardness in between.
everytime i run into him, im always debating within myself whether to approach him anot.
or even just to let him noe tt "i-saw-u-but-i-dunno-if-i-shld-tok-to-u"
anyway, i blked him out of anger the other time.
but when i decided to unblk him, i found tt i was blked by him.
n when someone blks sumbody, tt mins tt he dun wan to speak to tt person ryt?
i dun wan to risk approaching him alrdy n get ignored.
i admit im a coward. i hate situations lyk these.

i noe tt im not supposed to be the one who is the most angry cuz im not the one who is hurt the deepest.
i also noe tt the one who is hurt the deepest is alrdy ok with him.
n im probably the only one still holding a grudge against him.
n no, im not angry for e one who's hurt the deepest.
i noe everyone has been telling me tt.
but i am angry bcuz i saw hw he cld hurt his frens.

i guess tt none of us is willing the take the first step.
things will just have to remain as it is.

everyone is changing.
even the one who is hurt the deepest.
but i guess this is just wad everyone decided the best way to protect themselves.
changes r gd.
but if these decisions r affecting the quality of our frenship, then maybe everyone shld really start considering wad they really wan out of this.

im not pinning hopes on anybody.
i just need to express how i feel.
u can ignore me.

**
wah kao..
i shldnt even waste my time loh.
in the end i got this kind of reaction.

i just got news frm xt tt he does read blogs.
ah.. decided to post it up again.
cuz i realise tt if.. if he's gng to read this n become more angry.
then maybe i shldt really waste my time at all.
anyway mas selamat is caught.
so everybody.. rejoice!

bad news... kenji quit!
i dunno to let hu cut my hair le..

work has been getting better..
at least im not tt isolated..
eat with colleagues.
gng to places i seldom go..
kap's mac, np alumni, makan place..
sumtimes i can even joke with them..
which is so much better.
i may get suffocated if im not allowed to tok

today was very bad..
the rain came very suddenly..
bus stop crowded with np students to the extend tt with 3 options of bus to take, i can miss 10 of them.
luckily ran into one of the considered boss there.
n we two waited together.
reached office an hr late.

got a pleasant surprise today
i shall be paid directly by SIM nw.
not thru agency.
tt mins a pay rise.
ok lah.. only 50cents more.
it's not the money, it's the luck tt made me happy.
lol

the most ke lian person in this whole episode is the guy who started work with me..
he was stopped cuz apparently they did not needed so many pple.

G-U-L-L-I-B-L-E!!!







the amt of new n unused perfumes at my house.
accidentaly found the first one to be really nice n lasting!!

yo ho!!!

UK priortiy airmail arrived today..
which mins.. my "The Last Concubine" finally arrived.
well-printed.. no missing pages..
finally i can finish the bk!! yay!!

anyway... rmbed smth
i was telling jason tt he is my new BFF nw cuz we everyday tong bing xiang lian
then he was telling me bff need to buy each other presents
n i told him we r different
we r the spiritual kind
then he replied n said tt we r very holy..
n i laughed out loud in my office
hahah
imagine the two of us wearing halos n angel wings..
singing hallelujah...
super funny sight!!!

hello hello!!!

my auntie's in flying to spain nw
im super duper jealous
she gave us a gucci handbag n a burberry blue label slingbag..
used.. nonetheless.
but i dun see myself carrying it anyway..
oh.. n 4 bottles of lancome perfume.. wow!!
n also lancome cosmetics..
nnnnn. a RM600+ worth of jeans
which brand i didnt even heard of..
G.A Blue Jeans..
just checked it out.
Malaysian Brand
but anyway, i seldom wear jeans...
ahahahhaha.

im blabbering

yo ho!!!
sat went out with aunties n cousins to tampines one
AGAIN!
nth much to shop
cant even find a place to sit down n eat
walked over to tampines mall n settled on pu tien
it's ok.. tt's my fave
shopped a lil. but cant find anything nice
then watched movie. 17 again by zac efron
okok lah.. normal show.
went to auntie's hse
played abit of mahjong.. watched princess diary on disney channel n went home.

today ate shabu shabu steamboat..
hahahahah.

my parents r in genting..
georgina is leaving for thai in 3 days..
WAD AM I STILL DOING HERE!!!??

hahah..
i watched it!!
finally!!
i told myself if i didnt manage to catch it b4 it goes down, i will nv ever forgive myself.
anyway, wad is the whole plot abt??
i was only concentrating on him..

ate at korean restaurant at far east.
was kind of late but told my sis not to worry.
i dun tink ecgx will be w/o his shirt in the first few mins.
wth.. i went in n he was half-naked!!!
wad a pleasant welcome.. whahahah!
cldnt stop smiling whenever his scenes r up.
i sound lyk some teeko auntie. lol.

omg! i can totally see deon's shadow in one of my colleague.
they way he talks, the randomness, the voice n even the way he use words.

SUPER DEON!!

ok.. back to work.. bye!

yo!

things r getting better hahaha
im eating with my colleagues.
we even drove to IMM today
the guy beside tok to me ytd..
i dunno whether to laugh or cry..
lol.. even tho it's only abt work.
i min just the day b4 i alrdy wrote tt we will see hu can outlast each other n the next day he talked. lol

but ytd 3 guys pissed me off.
one was hugging th bus metal pole lyk he is determined to protect it.
one was looking at me when im waiting for his car to drive off so tt i can cross.
one was doing the very stupid mouth sound lyk im his dog.

no respects for gals.

i guess thefortune teller was right in some ways.
ever since my parents knew tt my father is against red,
now he seldom scolds me, nor do we quarrel anymore.
i tink both of us r trying to control ourselves.
at one time i even tot tt i am a late bloomer, tt i;ve just entered the rebellious stage.

anyway, had been following up on the news abt the father throwing his baby into the boiling pot of oil.
tt's so cruel.
but tt has been all i've done so far.
until today morning when i dreamt of a baby child surrounded by devil-looking alligators.
i suddenly got so worried abt the baby n wondered y is nobody rescuing her.
till the point when my alarm ring, i didnt even bothered to switch it off cuz im still "looking out" for the baby.
then it strikes me, y didnt i pray for her at all?
might sounds childish, but i tot tt's a sign frm God.
while praying, i was kinda lost for words.
i ended up with wishing tt God will just stay by her side.
but the latest news is - she did not survived.
i guess it was for her own good in some ways.
even if she survived, the odd looks frm the public abt her skin n everything will be too much for a kid to handle.
anyway, i believe now she's not suffering anymore.

oh n i also have to say smth
it's my own personal opinion btw.
i truly agree with wad jackie chan had commented abt the Chinese.
as a Chinese myself!
i min, which part did he even say wrongly??

n also, commenting on Zhang Zi Yi being a disgrace to the Chinese just cuz she acted as some seductive women in Horsemen n a geisha in Memoirs of a Geisha?
when chinese artistes managed to get into hollywood, the chinese r so proud of it.
but when they really acted in a hollywood movie, there's always smth not satisfying for the chinese.
forget it la, we shld just stay inside our own Chinese circle.
dun even tink abt venturing out!

hah. i've been reading newspaper on a regular basis nw.
but i always skip the politics part.. lol

i even bought the instrumental album..
hoping it will calm me down..

oh.. tml's SNIPER and Korean BBQ with mei mei!!

and.. my father's getting very traumatized nw..
we were planning on a yr-end korea skiing trip.
but aft the korean bbq tt time, he realisd he cldntget use to korea food.
hahahah.
while me n my sis agreed tt we will save 4000 bucks.
once we reach tt target, the two of us will go on a euro tour.
no parents!

everytime aft i read georgina's blog..
i dun feel lyk blogging at all.
i feel tt im always blogging in broken english.
lolol.

anyway.....
the jap restaurant at tampines one is so cool!
it's a marche-concept.
n the food there r so tempting!!
i wan to go again!

work again..
at least nw it feels better cuz i initiated to join my colleagues for lunch
at least im not eating alone.

as for the guy working beside me..
hahah. let's see hu can outlast each other in not toking to each other at all.

photo hosting is back to normal..
i can finally delete file!!