sumtimes..
i just wish tt i haf the courage to stand up to u..
to tell u wad i really feel..
wad i really tink..
but i didnt want to..
i wan to minimize our conflicts..
but i tink it backfired..
over n over again..
we got into a deeper n deeper misuderstanding with each other..
i didnt wan it to be lyk this..
nw i dunno wad to do..
when i requested to learn piano again..
im not trying to make u spend money on me..
i just wan u to noe tt THIS is my interest..
it's not just smth to kill time lyk as u said..
u made me feel lyk my interest is RUBBISH..
i expected a "no" as an ans..
ive long expected it..
but the way u phrased it just hurts me so much..
u said tt i dun tink for the family..
u said im just all abt myself..
i dunno y i trembled when i heard these words..
there's better ways of saying "no" w/o bringing pple down..
i hope u understand..
n u said tt i didnt sympathize with the family hu's father died at the mrt station..
y r u saying tt??
u were nv there when i express my feelings for them.. were u?
u r stuck on the tv.. always..
u made me hurt once again..
is my feelings a joke for u??
i noe u will nv see these words tt i wrote..
i didnt plan to let u noe anyway..
u'll always tink of other ways to bring me down again..
when i was still young..
i tried to tok to u using alot of ways..
but no use..
so i tried writing a letter..
im better at expressing tt way i guess..
i told u all all tt i felt..
but ur first words to me were..
"is this hw u r gng to communicate with me?"
u told me tt angrily..
i rmbed..
y? y r u angry?
shldnt this prove smth to u?
i dun understand..
i dunno y i cry while writing..
but i've always rmb wad Celine told me..
she told me to respect my parents n nv tok back..
i m practicing it..
i havent tok back for lots n lots of arguments..
i nv even tok when u scold me..
but y is the result lyk this??
all i wan is for u to noe how i feel.....
u noe i treasure ur comments more than anything in the world..
strangely.. i felt better aft saying everything out..
